I hate being ignored

Just back from a great trip to a great city! That’s the good news.

I also was supposed to get comments back from Dr. Ass Hole regarding my manuscript, which I turned in on November 30th. Still nothing. I wrote him...still nothing. WTF!





Me taking Dr. AH down...not ignoring me now are you bitch!!!!!



The fucker has has/had an R01 due. I would think at the very least that he would want to get this out for his own selfish reasons. Guess he would rather continue to be a fuck head to me than get the pub. I’m very doubtful my paper will ever see the light of day.

Man how I love to write shit that NOBODY will ever read. It’s a real motivator.

Meeting follow up

It went well. Yes, I have a draft that could be published as is. But we (the mediator and ) both know Dr. Ass Hole will come back with "feedback". Generally speaking, I'm thrilled to get feedback. I crave real feedback....bring on the feedback!

But let me give you an example of the kind of feedback I usually get:

E-mail from Dr. Ass Hole

...Authorship issues:

Given the amount of data on the G&D paper (6 pieces of data from you in the G&D paper, of 30 total in Table I), I find it appropriate that you are a second author.

I look forward to hearing from you soon on these issues.

Best,
Dr. Ass Hole

My thoughts: Yeah, he can't even count. Ok,lets count the 130 strains that I did make. verify and test that he chose not to put into the paper. Compared to everyone else's 10 to 20 strains made. It's like a lottery. also rigged because one strain I tested is the keystone of the manuscript. I tested this strain first. It was ignored by the lab. ~6 mo. later it comes up again in the literature. I remind them that I tested and saw a change. "oh...I guess that was not clear...." Fuck off, you didn't listen!

So I test it again. Shocker, it's phenotype is what I said it was.
Wow, says Dr. Ass Hole, Awesome...hey guys lets have Ms. Brown N. give this a look in her assay.

WTF

Blah, blah...more shit. But the crazy part happened today. As if crazy haven't happened before. But it can get really stupid really fast.

So I'm told by the mediator that Ms. Brown N. has taken full credit for a discovery I made in the lab, that is the BIG discovery! What? She wrote in her brief for her commiettee meeting the other day that "I was the first to do...and the first to show...."

Again, WTF? I have email documentation after I did these experiments between Dr. Ass Hole and Ms. Brown N. They both are "thrilled" about my result.

Now I'm bumped from proper authorship, and I no longer played any fucking role in the science that led our lab to this point.

Bone details of today's meeting:
1. Dissertation in by next Friday. Ok, shouldn't be too much of an issue.
2. I'm already past the dead line with the graduate college, so I wont be officially graduating till May. I'm actually happy about this. Provides the time needed to find a post doc position.
3. I am planning my defense for February. Which is great on the one hand, but on the other I wonder why I don't want to defend...truth is to have all of those people in a room looking at me knowing 1) I got fucked and 2) smirking about it.....well this will not be my proudest day.

here's to sucking it up and REALLY hoping I find a post doc position that will allow me to love the science again!


Wine of the day

2007 Madonna Alta Pinot Noir 750ML

One of the few Italian Pinot Noirs I have tried in my time as a wine enthusiast. That being said, I felt the wine had the three "S's." Softness, Silkiness, and Sexiness! Subtle cherry notes with great fresh expression. Relaxed tannins and a lengthy finish, super for it's price point. One of the most difficult varietals to find true value in, but this wine smashes that stereotype. A great Umbrian Pinot that drinks way above it's price point...who knew?!

Meeting with the Mediator today.

Big meeting with my “acting” PI (aka, the 3rd party "Mediator" between my real PI, Dr. Ass Hole and I). Now that I turned in my manuscript draft, I have a feeling he is going to tell me its time to plan on a defense date. Sigh....Definitely time to get the fuck out of here, but I just haven't begun to look for post doc positions.....

What do you want?

"I want great conversations, great sex, great friendship, great intimacy, great wine, whiskey and food."

Yes, that about sums it up!

How about the rest of y'all? What do you want?

EndNote about to expire

Romanée-Conti, DRC 1990 6 magnums at Zachy's New York in 2002 for $69,600, or $5,800 per regular bottle.

Crap. My trial version of EndNote will expire in 4 days. This does not jibe with my needs at all.

I DON’T WANT TO BUY ENDNOTE!!!! And I don’t have the time to hit someone up for a version on the sly......hummm

And this software really pisses me off. (My fault. Word to the wise, don’t wait till you are writing your manuscripts to figure this shit out! Big mistake). I'm trying to change the freakin output style in a iWork Pages document (not Word), and the manuals ect. keep giving me the run around!

Example:

EndNote Citation Search for EndNote references to select and insert as citations in your Pages ‘09 document. See page 366 for more information. EndNote Bibliography Insert and format a bibliography based on your citations. Pages will initially use the output style currently selected in EndNote.
The Edit>EndNote Citations submenu: ␣ Bibliography Format Choose a different bibliographic style to format the citations and bibliography. The style list shows those styles marked as “favorites” in EndNote. See page 336 for information about how to add styles to the list. ␣ Manage Citations Edit or delete existing citations. See “Editing Citations” on page 368 for more information.

Fuck off..........every one of those further pages were completely unhelpful!!!! Such a stupid thing to spend so much time on...CFS, just stop and go home. It's 5 in the morning for Christs sake.

Chateau Margaux 1787 insured for $225,000.

This column in Forbes Kills me!
Wine & Food Feature
World's Most Expensive Wines
Nick Passmore

wine angle

Dreaming of a better tomorrow!

For fuck's sake, engage!

I hate being naive and idealistic. I care enough about the people around me, their productivity, and a harmonious workplace to have difficult conversations!

I agree that we all should think before speaking about uncomfortable subjects, even carry a mental conversation before actually engaging others in real conversations. This can be key especially when a thorough mental work-up can defuse anger over the issue.

For fuck's sake!

I also don’t mean that we should always seek out and confront. Just be willing to say something!!! When a lab is at a point when no one has anything to say to one another, is a lab with a serious problem.

In my situation, I appreciate a destructive relationship between my PI and I may make some feel uncomfortable. However, since I am the type of individual who goes out of her way to not involve others, this should be a indicator that I’m mature enough to have a conversation about someone’s hobbies with out breaking down into tears or defaulting to a bitch session about how much I hate my PI.

Although, to at least acknowledging there even exists a problem but all agree to stay uninvolved could at least protect from alienation.


Wine of the day:

This is a Spanish red I recently enjoyed. I found it complex, with firm underlying tannins. And I found the the integrated flavors of mineral and lilac DELIGHTFUL...just how I like my conversations!

Bodegas Pinord Priorat, 2006
Subtle but solid, this red shows cassis, kirsch and vanilla flavors that are fresh and balanced, with well-integrated tannins and a floral finish. Drink now through 2016. Tasted twice, with consistent notes. 4,000 cases made. —Thomas Matthews